The Last Page

"Yun pala ibig sabihin ng panaginip ko. Yun pala yun. sana nakapag-ready ako"

     Things happen for a reason. I always believe on that. That even if a bad thing happen there's a reason for that. And I always thought of that reason. Searching for the answers to the "Why's" of my life. But it got me into thinking if will I ever get the answer?

     Ayoko dumating sa point na mapupunta ako ulit sa ganitong sitwasyon. Nakakatawa kasi dati ayaw ko ng madramang post kasi wala pa naman akong experience eh, kaso ngayon meron na. Haha. Sana lahat ng sakit pwedeng idaan sa tawa. Yung bang tipo na pag-tumawa ka mawawala lahat ng sakit. Na it's a fresh start! Kaso hindi. Kasi ang tawa, ang halakhak, parang short time remedy lang. Na pag wala na babalik ulit yung sakit. Ayoko mang maalala yung kahapon, kaso di ko magawa, kasi alam ko kahit masakit ang kinahinatnan, naging masaya ako. Naramdaman ko yung love.

     When he told me to stay away, I can't help but cry. I can't drive away my tears. Kasi I know that time, it was really the end. Sabi ko "Okay, sige." Sana hinayaan na lang niya dumating yung araw na aalis na siya. Para atleast dun matatanggap kong mawawala na siya. Hindi yung ganto araw-araw dadamdamin kong kahit andito pa siya di ko na siya makakausap. Things just have to end nga sabi nila. And this is the real ending. My story doesn't have the "happy ending". But it ends with both of us setting each other free. Maybe for now, I may not understand the reason why does it have to end this way, but I know, God will give me the answer soon. My story is full of ups and downs. Full of unsaid words, but no regrets. Painful as it seems, but lessons are learned. Not because I am letting go doesn't mean I am forgetting him. Because in the corner of my heart he will always be there. Reminding me how great our God is. How fate lead me to him again. How I became the impossible me because of him. As what they said the end is just the beginning. I'll be waiting for him. And I will always love him. This is the end of my story with him.

"I' am staying away not because I want to. But because I have to. Smile my dearest. Live to the fullest. Dream higher than the sky. You'll always be my star. I love you, hoping you still love me too."